ABOUT

MY STORY

My story, the catalyst for my salvation, my pursuit of Jesus and my ministry to parents. The loss of a child will change you. It did that for sure. But it did much more, it saved me. I didn’t know God had a design for parententing when I became one. I grew up in church but somehow missed the memo on the gift of life transformation. My ministry and desire to help parents is the overflow of hard fought healing, dedication to learning, a biblical worldview, a willingness to share the “misses' ' so you don’t have to live them and a commitment to share not only the gospel but my whole life. Loss broke me. Desperation and suffocating pain led me. Jesus found me searching for breath. Jesus is, after all, THE Breath of Life. Our Heavenly Father has an incredibly beautiful and powerful plan for the family… Legacy by Design. Join me and let’s journey together through your families seasons of life and love. Here is part of my journey:

A phone call in the spring of 2001 interrupted my life and changed it forever. My world was rocked, so was my soul. At the time I was too numb to care about my next breath. To be honest I didn’t breathe deeply for the next few years. Paralyzing anxiety by day, nightmares by night.

AsII launch this website i find the timing extraordinary, headlines about the horrors of abortion today, 22 years later. My third baby lost his life to this tragedy on May 12th, 2001. A decision ultimately made, by me, while under the counsel of many. “Interrupt the pregnancy” was the term. It was consistent. They, the counsel of many, unwavering. Me, trusting, fearful, compliant.

Induce.
Labor.
Delivery.

I don’t say horror lightly, that word chosen with intention.
I delivered my son and held him. He was 20 weeks old.

Not a clump of cells.
Not a fetus.
He was my baby.

Diagnosed with a fatal genetic disorder only 10 days before. I still remember, “If the tests come back you must deliver the fetus immediately” echoed the voice. “Fetus? Last week you used the word BABY, don’t you dare call my baby a fetus! Nothing has changed except a report.”, I cried.

Sound familiar?
Changed words, muddled definitions, disguised procedures don't change the reality, the Truth or the aftermath.

The doctor: “Interrupt” the pregnancy.
The geneticist: You don't want “this baby”.
The pastor: God has made up His mind and “this” baby was not meant to be.
Those I love aligned with “authority” in an effort to protect me.

Against nagging thoughts and unexplained pain, I complied.

20 weeks,
Induced.
Labor.
Delivery.
HELL. For three years.

And then one morning I found Jesus in a cul de sac.

Broken.
Redeemed.
Forgiven.
Healed.
Freed.

Jonathan you are now 22.
You reached heaven before me but I will be there one day because of you. I have tried to honor my God and your memory by sharing His divine design for life, family, parenting and freedom. Your short life has impacted many.
Your life has eternal purpose.
Until we meet again. ❤️